Happy New Year Readers,
I have a moderate attitude towards the New Year. I don’t put much stock into goals or life changes because I don’t generally follow through. Which sounds terrible to say, but it is the truth. My self-discipline doesn’t catch the enthusiasm I typically have for a fresh start when December waits for January to roll around. But I feel that this challenge for renewal that I am embarking on in my life is not me-centered, but God-centered.
I’m not expecting anything amazing to happen outside of spiritual awakening through Christ. In fact, if all that came of this journey was that God had a deeper more consecrated place in my heart for Him to dwell then I succeeded. That is all that I can hope for with any change I make in my life.
I’ve been pondering on the word renewal lately. We can run words through our minds like song lyrics or non-sensical sounds and before long, they no longer have much meaning. I’ve been doing the same with the word renewal- just replaying it over in my mind until it’s a broken record.
I feel the word running around in my spirit when I think about these next six months. These six months are devoted not to my goals but to what God has in mind for me. Renewal feels like a clue to what God has in mind, way before I see the fruits of His labor in my life. The Cambridge dictionary defines renew as, “(v) to increase the life of or replace something old, begin doing something again,” and renewal as, “(n) the act of making an official document, agreement, or rule continue for more time: the act of starting again or starting to do something again: a process in which something improves or is improved after being in a bad condition:”
Now, to be quite honest, the girl who likes to know the ending of the movie before she watches it reads those definitions and makes assumptions about what God may have in mind for me in the coming year. I’d love it if I gained all of my strength back, could go back to work full-time, and have a home to myself again. But that’s usually not how life works. I find that we tend to significantly lower the standard of a blessing simply because our creativity and faith aren’t at the same level as God’s imagination for each of us. We could never dream up the full power of what God has in mind for each of our lives, or how God intends to accomplish His plans, so why try?
What I do know is that for a year and a half, I have either fought or been recovering from Cancer. My body is weak. I cannot work full-time at all, and I have had to be patient with my ideas about what it means to be successful and content with what I can do each day that they come. While there hasn’t been understanding and patience from a few individuals throughout my journey, there has been overwhelming love, care, and understanding from most.
I have had to redefine what it means to be me post-cancer. It hasn’t been easy. I have seen how coming so close to death, clarified my priorities and purpose. I wanted to be intentional about living a life that honored those priorities. Part of honoring my purpose is creating and maintaining my writing projects and this website. I know deep in my soul that the Lord wants me to use the written word for His purposes. I put it off for so many years thinking that I had time later. Cancer made me realize that later sometimes doesn’t come along. It’s either here and now.
This is why I don’t want to come into the new year making assumptions about what God has in plan for me and my life. I do want to be an active participant in the process. God keeps reminding me that this year will be the best year of my life if it is the best spiritual year of my life. If I keep God as the focus and center of every decision I make, this will be a successful year. Regardless of whether I have a job, money, or a house. I want to begin by redefining what it means to be successful through God’s eyes and not the world’s.
Is it okay to not know where God wants to take me at the beginning of this journey, and just follow along quietly and peacefully behind Him as He leads me along the coming months? Because that is exactly what I feel like I am doing. I keep tugging at God’s Hands in prayer, asking Him where we’re going and He just shakes His head and laughs.
“You’ll see,” He answers as we keep walking.
I encourage each reader to take the time to rest with God today. Sit in the quiet restful presence of His spirit. Don’t think or talk, just sit in His presence and allow His Spirit to minister to your spirit. In that silence, the Lord will give you a word for this coming year as well because He has a will and purpose for each of our lives. I hope that you had an amazing New Year’s celebration and I look forward to hearing from everyone as this project continues forward over the next six months.
Click here for more information on The 6-Month Renewal Project